The Fowlkes Finds: Gonzaga's head wound, Baroni-Schilling beef, Wanderlei's latest

Wanderlei Silva

It seems like the worst part about losing a fight the way Gabriel Gonzaga did must be the flight home. Think of the indignities of air travel. The waiting around with strangers. The standing in line and shuffling along, trying to stay in your own little zone of personal space. Now imagine doing all that with a giant zipper running down the middle of your forehead.

Yeah, I’m sure people won’t stare or anything. I’m sure you’ll enjoy your pleasant little nine-hour flight home after that.

It’s Sunday. The world is cruel and pitiless. Those parts of the world that fall under the category of professional cagefighting are even less sympathetic. Won’t you pause with me to look upon this world as it appears from the great heights of the Internet?

Over on Twitter, Bellator MMA fighters Joe Schilling and Phil Baroni are, as the kids say, beefing. They’re beefing big time. It seems that Baroni was none too impressed with Schilling’s split-decision loss to Rafael Carvalho at Bellator 136 this past Friday night, and has since offered to fight Schilling in either MMA or kickboxing.

The only catch is, while Schilling would like to fight in May, Baroni needs some time to get in shape first. Eight to 10 weeks ought to do it, he said. Maybe by then they’ll have decided to let it go and forget the whole thing. Or maybe not.

Over at SI.com, Jon Wertheim had an insightful chat with Phil “CM Punk” Brooks about how his transition from pro wrestling to MMA is going. The most illuminating part might be his discussion of the “shark-infested” backstage politics among pro wrestlers at the WWE. It kind of helps you realize why he decided he wanted to fight for real, especially when he says stuff like this about his former coworkers:

“You wonder, Did you really punch me in the face? You say it was an accident but I know you and I think you’re a p—– and I’ve seen you do this to other people. Are you doing this to me? Did you kick me in the ribs as hard as you can?  No, no I would never do that! In [MMA] I know the other guy is going to try and kick me in the ribs as hard as he can. No, not maliciously. But I’ve been in the [wrestling] ring with plenty of guys where I’m wondering, Is he is trying hurt me? Is he mad because he is losing? I don’t have to deal with that bulls— any more. It’s a godsend.”

Meanwhile, Wanderlei Silva continues to say perfectly reasonable things while in the very next breath saying completely unreasonable ones. For instance, Silva’s thoughts on signing away his likeness rights in the UFC?

“I was in the video game and didn’t get paid anything for it. But OK, I signed the contract. Every fighter signs this contract and they get paid nothing. I just played it at a friend’s house and I was in the game, but I didn’t receive anything for it, while they make $300 million out of it.”

Good point, Wanderlei. But what about this drug test you avoided, which precipitated this current hardline stance as the Spartacus of MMA?

“If I’m going to fight you today, I have to be clean today. There are anti-inflammatories and painkillers that are considered doping, but are not. I’m against steroids. Steroids are bad. But the fighter has a right to do anything he wants out of competition. That’s his right. You can’t get into his life and take his blood to see what he’s doing. I’m against all types of drugs and steroids, but the athlete has the right to have a private life. He has to be clean on the day of the competition. Out of competition, that’s his life.”

Not a good point, Wanderlei. That is not how that works at all. Why must you contain such multitudes?

Oh look, a stand-and-bang-tastic GIF.

Hey, is that Rickson Gracie competing in a sambo tournament?

As long as we’re watching videos, watch this dude discover, in painful fashion, the limitations of the “drunken” fighting style.